It’s OK, not to be OK

Therapy or assistance to feel better emotionally is a stigma that continues even in the so-called educated 90’s kids.

On understanding and coming across such invalid assumptions and conceptions Akanksha Dharmani, decided to dig deep. She got in touch with many therapists and the 90’s kids to understand their opinion on the same.

Depression, frustration, sadness, negativity, not so good feeling are some commonly used words which we hear from a person who does not feel motivated. But there is something beyond this the person feels and often needs some help. But the social stigma that comes alongwith this often becomes a barrier. But, timely help can definitely bring a big change in our approach towards life.

Have you ever asked yourself some questions like ‘Am I truly living in the present moment ?’ ‘Why I did snap back or I could have responded better?’ ‘Why do I avoid a few situations?’ ‘Am I enough?’ ‘Do I follow an unhealthy pattern that lands me into dealing with similar problems now and then?’ ‘Am I letting my parenting issues affect my relationship?
It is absolutely normal to need some external, non-judgemental guidance to personal issues. We only empower the light within you to shine brighter, we do not make decisions for you. You are capable of it, you just need to be reminded. We are experts who bring clarity to your life.

What is the common issue faced by the 90’s kids ?
”One of the common issues faced by the 90’s generation is the ‘Breaking away from the conditioning’ that is their today doesn’t necessarily align with their learning and imagination of self. It is a deeper issue than identity crises. But I am proud to say that most of us the 90’s kids have chosen to be in this industry as mental health professionals and I do have a lot of clients especially 25-year old’s who are brave seeking clarity,” said Ashna Mitra, Counselling psychologist & therapist from Pune. 

Is the youth of today aware of the need for therapy ?
“There is a rise in self-awareness although, they do not come at an expected time. Early intervention is necessary. The common issue faced by them is their habit of instant gratification which especially during lockdown is tough. The need to be patient and content is important, ” said Pune based Jaysri Rengarajan, a consulting psychologist at Mind Matters. 

Which therapy is ideal for you ? 
Navneesh Makkad, Holistic Healing Therapist shared, “ It is a process of embracing oneself fully, without judging or rejecting the parts that might appear to be dark. It enables us to return back to the wholeness within by deeply accepting and giving loving attention to self. Thereby, letting go of that which doesn’t serve us anymore.” She promotes fully living your emotions is the best way to healing. She encourages practices of self love and meditation to her clients.

Kids need to understand that the best healing has to be holistic which serve them in the long term.

The issue of ‘unmet attention’ in particular is high due to the era we 90’s kids were born in it was revolutionary! The era saw gender equality movements, liberation, evolution and easy access to the internet, women empowerment with no universal guide to parenting. Everyone was trying their best but there was a lot that the parents also had to cope up in those days.

We interviewed with a few people who have experienced therapy. 
”Doing my sessions made me realize that the reality is much better than the imagination of it in my head. I understood what may be normal to you may not be normal to somebody else. The most emotional things can be dealt with pragmatically. Don’t let the problem become too big in our head. Also, most importantly I would be vocal if I am consulting a counsellor because it’s absolutely normal. Sometimes I need advice or clarity and talking to my friends won’t help because they will be partial to me. I rather go to somebody who gives me concrete unbiased advice so there is nothing to feel shy about. Therapy to me something everybody would need at some point and there is no stigma attached to it. I also took my mom it was hard to convenience her in the beginning she understood but it’s nice to deal with issues rather than dumping them on your family. It only gets better and now she enjoys it too”, Sonali Somji, Marketing head at Murphies and Doner Company.

“It is important to have a therapist on speed dial in our lives sometimes you happen to lose a track of self. I feel it is absolutely cool, I’ve been to a therapist multiple times. I come from a family that supports visiting a therapist or a counsellor. I approached a counsellor when I was at my lowest I had lost my mother, staying away from my husband, I had also lost my job. I was feeling extremely blank and worthless. Counselling helped me get a perspective of my life. I learnt how to live my emotions fully even the sad ones. I am sick of all toxic positivity. I think a lot of people think going to the therapist will make you stop feeling sad but no the therapist will help you understand the cause of sadness which most of us are unaware of and usually blame it on other things. The counsellor helps you achieve clarity. I stand for Therapy, ” said Meenal Patil, a radio jockey host of a show Total Dhamal on Radio One 94.3.

“I hit the rock bottom in my life about 6 years ago, I had major anger management issues. Therapy helped me in becoming a far better person.I am now a nutritionist and I still have a monthly session with my therapist who is also a vital part of my profession. I think it is absolutely normal to consult an expert to learn emotional management. You don’t need to be on high alert for this every individual can learn to respond better rather live better with themselves by taking charge of self and it is absolutely advisable to develop the skill with a couch for emotions and mental health it is called the Therapist” said Neha Pawar, a Nutritionist.